More on the issue...
Thank you for your comment anonymous aka Marissa. To explain, 'Anonymous' annoys me because I never have a positive comment from anonymous, always negative. And it’s not the ‘real name’ that I need, it’s just some identifying feature that makes you seem more real.
To clarify… I am not insecure. In fact, I see it that I am secure in that I am able to contemplate this relationship, weigh up the pros and cons, ask others opinions, and deal with the negatives that come from people who know me as well. However, (and I don’t want this to come across like I am a slut!) I have dated a fair number of men over the years, the vast majority of whom were in the more acceptable age-range for me. And I know that there are many other men out there who are my age who I could date. I am not settling with an older man due to lack of options. And these men come from a wide variety of circles – I’ve dated men from church, men I’ve met in clubs, men I’ve met through work, men I’ve known from school, men I’ve met while travelling, men who are friends of friends, (never dated a man I’ve met at the gym… maybe I should work on that...), men I’ve met in the National Art Gallery and men I've met dancing salsa.
Maybe it is that I am boring for my age. Maybe I am too old for my age. Maybe I should start looking in other places! However, I find that the guys I know near my own age do nothing for me at the end of the day. Guys my age who I am good friends with admit that they don’t like dating girls my age as ‘we have issues’, we ‘want too much from them’ and we ‘are too independent’. I even had a good friend (a guy with a good job, just finishing his MBA, cute etc) tell me that he couldn’t deal with a girl like me as we would expect to have intelligent conversation in an evening after work when all he would want is sex! And I want a man who is secure in himself, knows what he wants and can deal with me being who I am.
I know that this sounds like I am generalising – I know that there are some really great guys out there who are my age. However, I think most of them are taken by the smart girls who saw them early. Or they live abroad, and I can’t deal with long distance. Or maybe they are gay… but that’s a whole other post!
So at the end of all of this… I am still continuing. I am getting to know this great guy more. And I am thinking about the issues. And talking about them with him. He wants to know that I am fully aware of what I’d be getting myself into. And I want to know that he is fully aware of what he is getting himself into.
So I’ll continue to discuss it here, because it is something that is in my mind a lot. And after all, it is my blog!
And all comments are welcome – positive or negative! However, please just make up a name or something? It makes everyone seem more real, more human and more friendly!